Toilet Humour


My job is to sit at a desk from which I cannot see the outside world.

I would be able to look through a vision panel in a neighbouring office that has a window to the outside world but I can’t because the wheel chair access desk restricts where I can sit because there is no leg room.

It’s not that I don’t want to deny wheelchair patients and staff the ability to write comfortably at my desk it’s just that we don’t have a pen or paper or anything for them to write.  I don’t mean to write on, there is just nothing we want them to note down.

So – it means that I am stuck in the one position staring at a lovely picture that disguises the fact it’s a toilet wall.  When I get bored I look to my left and stare at another toilet wall.

I can do that three times in all.

Today, I cracked a joke…. and the boss (eventually) laughed so all was good.

I glibly said that I’d trained the men, for these are no ordinary toilets, oh no, they are unisex.  Not only are they unisex but we have a disabled toilet that is unisex too. It is so big inside that you could legitimately join the mile high club

except…. we are at lower ground level.

After the laughter at my joke it was explained to me that we cannot discriminate and that the men could be equally offended that we women kept the seat down at great inconvenience to the men.

I tried to argue aesthetics and really that we should all be putting the lid down but….

Hey ho !

Working in a hospital, it is the only time I’ve seen people wash their hands before they go to the toilet. Well, that’s what they do in Pathology.

Having three separate toilets is nicer than having stalls within.   We’ve noticed that people come down from other departments to use our loos.

As the boss says, people come here to have a shit in peace. Judging by the state of the loos I’d agree.

If you pardon the pun, I’ve gone right off this job.

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